My sister is dating someone I absolutely cannot stand. They live in another state so it’s hard to judge how happy she is in the day-to-day relationship. When I ask how serious she is about this guy – she admits she is not sure. How much leeway do I have to say, “You’re dating a douchebag”? I don’t want them to get married and have that come back to haunt me or drive a wedge between me and my sister. Do I have to just shut up and deal with this chump? He is rude to our parents, bossy, controlling and generally unpleasant. I am not the only one in my family with this opinion. I know I should be thinking about HER happiness… but what about meeeeeeeeeee (and honestly how can she be happy with this guy)?
Hire a prostitute to seduce him, have a handsome and sensitive private investigator videotape it, and then have the P.I. show it to your sister so she won’t have to know you’re the one who hired him. She’ll see the tape, be angry at the boyfriend, and the P.I. will comfort her. They’ll fall passionately in love and during their wedding toast you can reveal that you hired the prostitute, and since she’s so happy, she’ll forgive you and you can dance the last dance of the night with the hot P.I.’s hot brother.
This will totally happen. Or else this is the plot of a movie I saw last weekend on Lifetime.
Anyway, here, in short, are your answers:
1. You have no leeway. She’s your sister, not your alter-ego. You know the old saying…one girl’s douche is another girl’s treasure.
2. Yes, you have to deal with this chump, but no, you don’t have to shut up. I recommend the sneaky route. Fan the flames of your parents’ hatred of him. If they complain about the boyfriend, use every opportunity to say, “You know, you should really say something to him next time he’s rude to you.”
3. What about you? YOU are going to be a nice, supportive, sweet sister. You’re going to do what you can to make her realize her full dating potential without her knowing. Talk her up, make her feel good, listen quietly when she complains about her boyfriend, and have faith that in good time a girl as awesome as she is will realize there are too many great guys out there to be dating a crappy one.
Tags: family, significant other, totally annoying
May 7, 2009 at 8:28 am |
May I suggest another solution? After pining for your sister for years now, I think the time has come to storm the beach at San Fran and take the bunker. And if there are a couple douchebag casualties along the way, such is the nature of war.
If you’re willing to accept this mission, I’m in. Let’s make it happen.
September 1, 2010 at 5:47 pm |
Great post. I find the difficulties and enjoyment of meeting your siblings’ boyfriends or girlfriends to be fascinating. It seems there’s always growing pains whether you like them or not, but it’s much more difficult when you don’t. I’d love to read more on this topic.