Unsolicited Advice #5

To any gentleman thinking of serenading a woman on a date (like that guy on The Bachelorette last night): Don’t do it. Please. Unless you’re Bob Dylan or Bruce Springsteen, there’s no earthly reason you should be singing to someone unless they’ve specifically requested it. It may be cute at first, and she may think she likes it, but 10 years later when you’re still humming and strumming “Stairway to Heaven” she’s going to want to rip the guitar out of your hands and beat herself over the head with it.

This also goes for men who write poetry. It’s the height of embarrassment and awkwardness to have someone read their crappy poetry to you. I’m sweating just thinking about it.

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