Archive for August 7th, 2009

My girlfriend is too busy for me.

August 7, 2009

My partner and I have been together almost two years this coming October. However, at this moment I am somewhat confused on the way she has been acting lately with her emotions.  One day she is very affectionate and the next she is totally distant.  Last week she was invited to a birthday party this coming Saturday for a guy she works with. I had/have no issue with her going. HOWEVER, two days ago she stated that her two children would be at their dad’s house this weekend, and how much she wished I could find a babysitter for my son so that we could have the weekend alone. (At this point I figured she decided not to go to the birthday party and WOW we would get much needed time alone, because we just don’t have that time anymore). I found a sitter so we could get out for the weekend and told my partner that we had this weekend to ourselves and she “reminded” me about the birthday party and that she was going.  She does this quite a bit. We have not had time to ourselves for over two months and for the past two weeks I have pretty much begged to do anything with her! Camping, crafting, walking, driving here or there, hiking, or just anything to get some quality time. The funny thing is that she is able to drive to see her family, friends or anything else that is important to her (like the birthday party), but when I ask to do stuff with her, it’s either we are short on funds or we don’t have the gas to do so.  What in the hell do I have to do to get her attention or to spend time with me. I’m tired of always asking but nothing gives. PLEASE HELP.

What you have to do to get attention from her is break up with her and date someone who isn’t mean and bitchy.

I know you like her, but really. Let’s think about this:

  • instead of being excited that you have a weekend alone together, she’s like, “I’m going to a party without you.”
  • you offer to do FREE things with her and she claims she can’t afford said free things
  • she makes time for other people and activities, just not for you
  • you have to beg her to spend time with you

I am very, very sorry, but I think she’s probably trying to piss you off so that you’ll break up with her so she doesn’t have to do it. Wouldn’t you rather spend Saturday night alone than spend Saturday night dwelling on the fact that the person who is supposed to love you is out partying with the people from her office? (Who spends Saturday night with people from their office? Seriously! Who?)

So break up with her and see how it goes. To help you get through this period of sadness, I suggest drinking a lot and going on a trip. Or, go on a trip and drink a lot. Whichever works for you.

My roommate brings guys home and it’s gross.

August 7, 2009

I am in college. My roommate sometimes brings guys back to our room in the middle of the night. I DO NOT want to hear what I’m hearing but my roommate is popular in our group of friends and I don’t want to make her mad because I am afraid she will turn everyone else against me. But I’m sick of being woken up and even more sick of hearing her make out with whatever guy she met in the bar that night. How can I get her to stop without pissing her off?

Don’t worry; you have so many options. This is going to be fun! Here are some ideas, but of course, feel free to get creative and do some mixing and matching:

1. Be shady. Blackmail is always a winner, if you can get over any silly moral and/or legal hangups. Be patient, and take a few quick pictures on a couple different mornings with your cell phone. Your roommate may be mean and have the power to turn an entire university against you with her words, but you’re going to have a fine collection of photographs of her nestled in the arms of a variety of gentlemen. Email her the pictures with a nice little note that says, KNOCK IT OFF, OR I’M SHARING.

2. Be creepy. After she and her new friend get home, wait a couple minutes until they’re settled into their nighttime activity, and then turn on the light. Wear a Golden Girls-style muumuu, a beekeeper’s outfit, or a Batman costume, turn on the light when they least expect it, and say in your sexiest voice, “Want company?” You’ll freak her out and when she tells people what you did, just be like, “Oh, sure, like I would really do something that weird.”

3. Be clumsy with your dialing finger. Sneak her cell phone out of her purse, hit her mom’s number, and leave the phone next to the bed. Problem solved.


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