Monthly Archives: December 2009
So, if he’s adding new Facebook friends and not emailing me, that means he didn’t suddenly turn Amish, right?
So, let’s say you’re waiting for someone to email you back. You assume he’s out of town on vacation, maybe at his grandmother’s house, where he doesn’t get cell reception and there’s no internet. Then you notice that his Facebook … Continue reading
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My girlfriend is a crappy actor.
I’m a supportive guy. My girlfriend waits tables while she tries to become a successful actor. I know how long it takes to make a name for yourself, and how much time and dedication it takes. She’s fully committed and … Continue reading
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Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas, everyone. I’ll be back on Monday. In the mean time, take notes and ask me to help you out with your passive-aggressive in-laws and mentally ill neighbors next week.
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To stay with mom or not stay with mom. On the floor. When I live only an hour away. That’s the question.
My brother and his husband usually come to my mom’s house for Christmas Eve and spend the night. She lives in New Jersey and they live in New York City. This year they really want to go back to their … Continue reading
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My coworker REALLY liked that Starbucks card I gave him. So much he sent me a dirty email.
My colleague at work and I have a nice, flirtatious relationship. Occasionally at the end of the day before I go home, he’ll give me a squeeze on the shoulder or a pat on the back. Well, yesterday I gave … Continue reading
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I have a house full of guests coming and I just want to be alone.
I hate having houseguests. It bugs me to have people in my living room watching TV and wanting snacks. I hate having my routine disrupted, having to run the dishwasher five times a day, having every meal being a production … Continue reading
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I found my husband’s porn collection.
Okay. I was doing some cleaning and found my husband’s porn collection. There were all these DVDs and some magazines hidden in our closet. I swear I wasn’t looking for anything! I was just cleaning out the closet. I always … Continue reading
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Unsolicited Advice #16
To the lady at the Gap, the woman in the school parking lot, the woman in the post office, and the random chick in the doctor’s office, and all other people who feel compelled to say shit to pregnant women: … Continue reading
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I think I’m addicted to my bad boyfriend.
Could I be addicted to a person? “Jake” and I have been dating on and off for years. He is not, to say the least, a good boyfriend. I haven’t always been the best girlfriend. We are so on-again, off-again … Continue reading
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