Outgoing people, married people, and people on Prozac are all like this.

I’m shy and my boyfriend isn’t. He’s isn’t mean about it but he’s always encouraging (pushing) me to come out of my shell etc. and I’m just tired of having this conversation. I am never going to strike up a conversation with strangers, be 100% comfortable talking to people I just met, or walk into a party and announce my arrival. So I’m a little quiet. I like my shell. Is there anything wrong with that?

The next time you go out, wear a boobalicious top and hot pants. When you walk into the room, jump up and down and yell, “Yoo-hoo, Judy’s here, and I’m wearing my party panties!”

Then drink too much, and talk to anyone who comes within a 10-foot radius. Loudly repeat limericks that involve the word “Nantucket” and tell jokes that involve Playboy bunnies, a cucumber, and a desert island.

By the end of the night I’m sure he’ll be desperately wishing you were back in your shell.

(Or, next time he tries to tell you to come out of your shell, just holler, “HOW’S THIS? SHUT THE HELL UP!”)

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s