Baby showers: sucking the joy out of parenthood before it even starts.

I’m planning a baby shower for my sister, or at least I was. Her friend called me and said that it’s tacky for a family member to host a shower and that she’d like to take over responsibilities. She also said it’s rude to register for gifts, and has a million other opinions about acceptable shower etiquette. I don’t care about the proper etiquette. I want to throw my sister a baby shower and I want her to receive gifts that she wants and can use. At my shower I got a lot of useless things (Like bathrobes! What baby needs a bathrobe?) and it was a burden to have all this stuff I didn’t want or need and felt guilty about returning. Am I making my sister look bad by hosting the shower? Should I just let her friend take over?

Yes, you’re a real a-hole for wanting to throw a party for your pregnant sister.

No matter what the official rules are regarding this sort of thing, it’s far tackier to call someone and tell her what a cheeseball she is than to commandeer the shindig she’s trying to throw. I think you should tell her to shove her baby bottle party favors up her arse. Unfortunately, you can’t do this, because she’s your sister’s friend and you don’t want your sister to feel stuck in the middle.

What you can do is politely decline her offer, explain to her that you’ve already made all the plans and would love to have her help putting it all together. And then at the shower just spit in her punch.

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