What’s less fun than being a bridesmaid? Public speaking while bridesmaiding!

My best friend asked me read a special poem from her and her fiance at their wedding reception. I’m very touched and I want to be there for her except I’m terrified of public speaking. Even thinking about being a bridesmaid makes me want to throw up. I don’t think I can stand in front of a whole group of people and read something without crying, shaking uncontrollably, or fainting. Help me!

Please don’t try to imagine everyone naked. That’s a terrible trick that never works; it’s time-consuming and prevents you from being able to look anyone in the eye later.

Please don’t have 42 drinks beforehand. You’ll still be nervous, and being nervous and drunk is a 100% guarantee that you’re going to upchuck prosciutto-wrapped asparagus spears in front of 200 people who are going to talk about you for the next 25 years. Some crazy girl got shit-faced about 18 years ago at my cousin’s wedding and did an insane, drunken dance routine. My sister and I are still laughing at her. You should have 1.5 drinks first. That’s it. Afterward, do a Jaeger shot, but before, only 1.5 drinks.

One of the most funny, outgoing, not-shy people I know hates speaking in public. She gave a lovely toast at a wedding, and endeared herself and her nervousness to everyone by announcing, before she read her speech, “I’m very nervous, and I’m embarrassed because I think my leg is shaking.” There was laughter, there was sympathy; it was great.

1 Comment

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One response to “What’s less fun than being a bridesmaid? Public speaking while bridesmaiding!

  1. eventweddinggirl

    Being a bridesmaid is a real honor. I was one in my older sisters wedding and will be one in my younger sisters wedding this coming December. It can be a bit nerve wrecking walking all alone with everyone’s eyes on you. I have been there, and I tend to think I am a pretty confident person.

    As for speaking in front of people especially something that is so meaningful to the bride and groom. I guess you could just focus on them at that moment. Although I know it is supposed to be directed at everyone else….I always find that when I look at the two people I am speaking about or at least continually glance at them I have an easier time getting through it.

    I would not recommend drinking a lot before hand. As you said I think that can only lead to disaster. Just think of what an honor it is though that they have asked you to speak!

    That in itself is very special and I am sure they would not have asked you if they did not have complete faith that you could accomplish the task with grace and elegance!

    You will be fine I am sure….just keep telling yourself that you will do a wonderful job.

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