My husband doesn’t find our children to be relaxing.

My husband works ten hours a day, and is basically chained to his desk the whole time. He is exhausted when he gets home from work. A couple months ago, he asked me to feed the kids dinner before he gets home so that after they go to bed, the two of us could have a quiet, peaceful meal together. I’m okay with that, so I started feeding and bathing them before he got home. He would play with them for fifteen minutes, I would put them to bed, and then we would eat.

Last night he told me that he actually wants me to put the kids to bed before he gets home from work, because he’s so stressed out and the children are so loud and bedtime is so chaotic. He said he needs to relax when he gets home, and that he can’t do so when the kids are awake and we’re doing our bedtime routine.

Am I crazy to think he’s being an ass?

You’re crazy, but it’s because you humored his inane bullshit in the first place.

Stay-at-home parents are not chefs, housekeepers, or social directors for their spouses. If your husband wants the kids to go to bed earlier, he should, by all means, help you hustle them to bed as soon as he gets home. If your husband wants alone time with you in the evenings, he should hire a babysitter to put the kids to bed and take you out for a nice dinner. You shouldn’t have to run around like Mary Poppins on speed before he gets home from work in order to prevent his poor overtaxed brain from hearing an unpleasant sound from one of the CHILDREN that he (I’m assuming) WILLINGLY (and most likely enthusiastically) HELPED TO CREATE.

He’s a big fat baby and sounds like kind of a high-maintenance douchebag. If he wants to relax at the end of the day, he should listen to Mozart on his way home from work and take ten deep breaths before he walks into the house. If I were you, I would completely ignore him.

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