I’m a realtor. Every New Year, I email all my clients from the past year to check in and see if they’re still interested in buying a house. One of my clients from last year happened to include a super cute single guy. My email was strictly business, but he replied and said that he wasn’t ready to buy a house right now, but he would love to take me out to dinner. Well, hello! I’m just getting back into the dating thing after a devastating breakup (a long time ago), and I was really excited to go out with him.
So I meet him out, and he’s adorable and funny, and then about twenty minutes into our great conversation, he mentions that he’s seeing someone. Okay…not great. And then he mentions that she and I actually have a mutual friend. Not great either. And THEN he mentions that since his girlfriend and I have a friend in common, he thought we would get along, so he invited her to come meet us! Not only that, but he said that when he told her he was meeting me out, she said, “That sounds to me like you’re going out on a date.”
Needless to say, when the girlfriend showed up it was terribly awkward. He even mentioned during our conversation that he had forgotten since the last time he saw me how cute I am. The whole thing was weird and I chugged my beer and inhaled my dinner and left. I thought that would be the end of it, but no. I got an email from him the next day saying how much fun he had, and how he’d like to do it again some time.
What the hell do I write back to him? And I can’t believe I’m asking this, but should I go out with him again? He’s really cute…
Email option #1:
Thank you so much for asking me out to dinner last night with you and your girlfriend. It appears that you two are trying to have a three-way with me, or else you’re so dumb you don’t understand the concept of “dating.” Either way, I’m definitely not going anywhere with you ever again.While the prospect of a nice free meal and a case of chlamydia is appealing on several levels, I think I’m going to hold out for a guy who isn’t cheating on his girlfriend right in front of her face.
Email option #2:
That was so fun! I have really low self-esteem and I’m fairly certain that the only boyfriend I can ever get is one who already has a girlfriend who comes on dates with us, so I’d love to see you guys again. I’ll sit in the back seat if you come pick me up, but if you want me to put out your girlfriend is going to have to wait outside the car.
Email option #3:
I had a lovely time last night; it was nice to see the two of you. Please keep me in mind for your future real estate needs.
(I want to add as an aside here that while this wasn’t the greatest start to your recently relaunched love life, you needn’t despair. Just view this and all future dates with dipshits as practice for the one magical date where you find the man of your dreams.)